We cannot change the behaviour of others, we can only ever change yourself. This will, in turn, mean that others will have to respond or behaviour differently towards us as a result of us changing. It does not excuse others bad behaviour(s) it simply prevents us from expending useful energy on trying to change the other person. It also enables us to free ourselves from all of the 'CRAP' that affects us and bombards us from individuals that surround us.
We can all belong to either either PES or NES. PES = positive emotional style. NES = negative emotional style.
When presented with a horrible irritated person or by a not nice criticism, internal or external, ask yourself these questions:
- Is it true?
- Can I absolutely know it to be true that this person / criticism is what I think it to be?
- How do I feel or act when I believe it?
- Who would |I be without the thought?
The turnaround. Instead of presuming the other person is ... We turn thing around and assume that 'we' are being horrible etc and turn the those questions around and onto ourself and reflect on the outcome or assessment of self.
Thoughts become things! (so choose the good ones)
Pink Love Exercise
Visualise a ball of pink love exploding through their bodyies and permeating their atoms.
Visualise Sending Love
Visualise sending love and energy to those people, who you have issues with, who you love, who live locally, nationally, internationally, to yourself.
Further Research / Reading / Courses
Byron Katie: Loving What Is
The self forgiveness process
Hopopono pono pono project? (think this is what it is called(
David Hamilton: I HEART ME!